Everyone makes mistakes.
How you handle errors is what affects your career, personal credibility and self.
The first step is accepting your mistake. Surprisingly not everyone finds it easy to do this much. And here’s where the problems begin.
Much has been said about How To Apologize, appropriately. But in reality, I’ve seen more significant relationship damage and personal harm done by those who simply just don’t accept their wrong.
Maybe it’s a personality trait or a willful disregard? Perhaps you’re running late? Maybe you’re just generally stubborn? In any event if you fail to make that apology, the damage might never truly be undone.
By merely acknowledging your error you can actually Enhance Your Image as you:
- Prove you can see Others’ Perspective/Another View
- Show Magnanimity
- Demonstrate Empathy
- Exude Openness/Objectivity/Professionalism
- Share your Humanity
- Move forward in addressing Corrective Action and Self-Development
A simple act of acknowledgment helps in establishing these characteristics in your makeup; the absence of recognition does just the opposite.
With acknowledgement, you also avoid giving out perceived messages of:
- Self-importance
- Lack of Objectivity/being one eyed
- Intended Ill-will
- Perfectionism/always right
- Aloofness
- Inept Leadership
- Poor communications
- Lack of sensitivity, etc.
These are all serious consequences and will harm you in any relationship.
Let’s face it if you can’t see your part in an error/problem you really have an issue. Perhaps you have many issues?
Just acknowledging an error is an opportunity towards better understanding your real self.
Well-respected leaders can accept when they are wrong. It’s typically just part of the reason they are well, respected.
Once you’ve seen your mistake, you should quickly move to an appropriate apology as/if required. This doesn’t mean throwing yourself on a sword. Sometimes a few words are needed privately; in others an acknowledgment in a more open forum is appropriate.
If you need to apologize be sure to address the matter with:
- Essential and Affected People/Person present
- Timely Acknowledgment
- Required Seriousness and Urgency
- Brevity (it’s not a drawn-out confession)
- Acknowledgment of Consequences from error
- Empathy/Human Touch
- Unqualified Acknowledgment of the Other Perspective (if there is one)
- Professionalism
- An outline of Corrective Action
- Above all, Say you’re Sorry (with appropriate decorum)
Within themselves most errors are not the end of the world. However, many errors can grow dramatically in significance if not acknowledged (their emotional impact), or are covered up (where both the Clinton/Lewinsky scandal and Nixon/Watergate events are examples).
Being too small or petty to admit when you’re wrong can and will come back to haunt you. By definition, you then truly have real issues to resolve. Additionally, your standing and image can only suffer.
These same issues play out in the workplace, interpersonal relationships, in marriages and throughout our lives. So, be the bigger person. Learn to read and own the consequences of your words, actions and inactions.
Have you been in the wrong recently? Blown off any apologies you owed? Failed to be sufficiently honest or open in your acknowledgments of fault?
It’s never too late to right a wrong. And after all, the more fairly you treat others the more you’re just helping yourself, anyway!
Ian R. Mackintosh is the author of Empower Your Inner Manager Twitter @ianrmackintosh